It takes work to make a relationship last. One thing that is sure to sabotage a couple is snide comments. Harmful remarks are hard to brush off sometimes and can build up causing resentment.

If the remarks continue, it may be time to say something. If you don’t you may begin to feel resentful and feel like lashing out yourself. Following are some ways to avoid a battle with your spouse.

1. If it’s infrequent, try ignoring it. Assume that your partner just had a bad day and didn’t mean it.

2. If it happens a second and subsequent time, you should speak up. Let your partner know how those comments make you feel. Be specific and explain your feelings.

3. You may find couples counseling to be helpful. Weekly or monthly appointments may be useful, to resolve your issues. Let each other know what’s bothering you but also what you appreciate about each other.

Frequent counseling also gives couples a chance to address things discussed in previous sessions. That way, things are not left unsaid.

For the meetings to succeed, both people must feel safe and not fear expressing themselves. Use non-blaming statements and try to understand each other’s point of view.

So, do your part to enable your relationship to go the distance. If your partner snaps at you, give him the benefit of the doubt and let it go. If it is an on-going problem, however, call him out on it before you lose it. Explain how it makes you feel without placing blame.

Be sure to discuss your issues before they become deal breakers and you find yourself single.

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